Good morning everyone and happy Monday (if there is such a thing!) Hope you all had a lovely weekend, mine was pretty chilled out but I did go and join the gym finally, eek!

If you follow me on social media you will know I have said I would be joining it (so this post won't come as much of a surprise) but you will also know I said how anxious the gym makes me. I can't put my finger on the reason why, it just does. I think I just feel so out of place there and so self concious. Even when I went for my induction yesterday,  I could feel myself becoming rigid as I got towards the doors to walk into the gym.

Being in a gym, for me, is like being at a party I wasn't invited to. My brain convinces me that I shouldn't be there and that everyone in there working out is looking at me and thinking the same. If I am unsure of how to use a machine I get nervous and then get clumsy making it look more obvious that I don't know what I am doing. Once again my brain tells me that people are watching and thinking:

'What on earth is she doing here?'

Stupid anxiety!

The difference with me now is I know they are all thoughts and not reality. I know that I don't have to believe every thought that pops into my head and really, is anyone actually looking at me? I know I'm not looking at anyone else that's for sure so I bet no one else has even noticed me. And if they have so what? Worst case scenario if someone is looking at me and judging me then do I really care? It says more about that person than me.

I am really looking forward to this new happiness journey I am subjecting myself to in 2017. I am looking forward to feeling the mental effects the gym will have on me as well as the physical effects of getting fitter and stronger.

Please stick with me on this new path, especially if you are in the same boat as me and are wanting to make this year a happier and healthier one too. Yes, of course I want to shift some weight in the gym too but my main goal is to be happy and content. Any work out tips will be gratefully received though and thanks to everyone who has given me advice and support so far, it really means a lot.

I will keep you posted as to how I am doing on here and as have I previously mentioned, I will be launching a mental health and wellbeing blog very soon too. In the meantime I micro blog a lot of my health and habits on Instagram if you want to give me a little follow. (NickiKinickie)

Till next time, have a great day!